You’re Being Ridiculous! by C.E.A Forster – memoirs of a foster carer

Today I would like to share with you a memoir by C.E.A. Forster. The author is a foster carer and she has decided to share her stories within the pages of her book, You’re Being Ridiculous!

A new authorial voice relaying true stories that are likely to both horrify you and make you laugh out loud. Events and conversations are told with pace, humour and humanity as the author shares with you her memories of the situations she has lovingly endured while at the mercy of her numerous foster boys. It is heart warming, heart breaking and heartfelt in equal measures. It is a memoir of sorts but it is definitely not a misery memoir.

http://ceaforster.com

Synopsis

C.E.A. Forster is youngish, conceivably pushing middle age, although she would argue as to where that line is drawn, and she is just wanting to share with you the trials, tribulations and sheer joy of her time as a foster carer.

She writes of the sounds of bystanders that she can still to this day hear ringing in her ears, tutting at her apparent inability to control the children in her care and of the mayhem that follows theme everywhere, along with her repeated admonition to them of “you’re being ridiculous!”.

Claire has experienced this awful questions in the most public of places concerning the differences between boys and girls and has been informed by a six year old on the habits of mating Turtles. Have you ever heard of pee wars? Have you ever crash landed in a World War II plane and lived to tell the tale? Not to mention some of the topics discussed at the dinner table that would make even the most bold of us blush.

Claire won’t mind you laughing at her or with her and she will leave you knowing, in no uncertain terms, just how much she grew to love these boys and how they will always have a special place in her heart. She hopes that maybe one day they will come back into her life to remind her of their own memories.

You can feel the love and compassion Claire has felt for each and every one of the children that have shared her home. It is not a light undertaking being a foster carer, to provide a safe haven for these troubled young souls who for whatever reason have found themselves in need of temporary shelter.

Each child that she talks about within the book has obviously had a massive impact on her life and we can hope the their stories each have happy endings but one thing we can be sure of is that for a brief time they were able to be with someone who shared with them her zest for life, sense of humour and who was willing to love and care for them unconditionally, providing them with a brief respite before they moved on to whatever the future has in store for them.

Claire decided to share her life and her home with children who were in need of care, love and an escape from the difficulties they faced. She is very considerate and discrete in her narration. This isn’t about the horrors and heartbreak that the children may have come from. It’s not about the effect their young experiences have had on them but it’s about nurturing and helping those fragile beings so they leave a little brighter and a little happier than when they arrived. This book is a celebration of her decision to become a foster carer and the kindness and love she has been able to provide these children during the time they are with her. The children may have only been with Claire for a short time but I can tell she will always carry a little of them with her and I imagine that they will carry something of her too.

A light-hearted, funny and yet at times sad book, this was a pleasure to read. As a parent I can understand some of Claire’s more cringe-worthy encounters but she seems to have addressed some tricky (and at times very embarrassing moments) with a cool, calm head. Any parent will tell you that you learn on the job and no two children are ever the same. For a foster carer this can be even more of a challenge as they have such little knowledge of the small but powerful personalities presented before them and are left to constantly think on their feet.

I feel that it is wonderful to know that there are people such as Claire out there ready to be there for these children, whatever circumstances they may be coming from.

Thank you Claire for inviting me to read and review You’re Being Ridiculous!

You can discover more about Claire by visiting her website here or follow her on Twitter @cea_forster

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John Sutherland – A Liz Robinson Author of the Month.

Liz Robinson knows a good book when she reads one and this month she has picked John Sutherland, as the author who has stood out and grabbed her attention. Over to Liz…

My April book of the month is a biography, a rather special, searingly honest insight into policing, ‘Blue A Memoir’ by John Sutherland.

A candid, objective, cooly passionate, and often unsettling account of policing from a police officer. John Sutherland joined the Met in 1992 aged 22, we see snapshots of his life as an officer, as he progresses up the career ladder, as he deals with all the horrors and glory a life in blue has to offer. From the very first page my attention was sucked in whole, I come from a family of blue, married blue, and spent 20 years as a member of police support staff. Even then, I was on the edge of understanding, I didn’t ever have to run towards danger, tell someone a loved one had died, sit with death, experience the bitter lows, the jubilant highs of being a police officer, yet John Sutherland takes you there.

As we read, we step in and out of a series of events that have all added up to create this man. It isn’t a glittery or gory descriptive feast, but it doesn’t have to be, he simply and clearly gives you a connection, and an understanding that under that uniform is flesh and blood and feelings. One thing is abundantly clear, this man loves his job.  He feels the continued effort is worth it and yet it very nearly broke him. It is truly captivating; whether you nod, smile wryly and wish he could have been your boss, or feel the shock and admiration as you learn what our police are exposed to day after day. ‘Blue: A Memoir’ is a worthwhile and fascinating read, I really do recommend it with my heart and soul.

Note: John has written an epilogue to his story, which has been included in the paperback of ‘Blue A Memoir’. He speaks with his normal good sense, and he has the remarkable ability to put into words the thoughts and feelings so many officers struggle to properly articulate. He speaks from the heart, and his words made me cry. I wish him every success in his future, and whatever path he decides to explore. I’m quite sure to the many who know him, follow him on twitter and read his blog, he will forever remain a true inspiration.

Liz in conversation with John Sutherland 

Liz – ‘You’ve been incredibly honest in ‘Blue A Memoir’, prior to the publication did you have any concerns about feedback?’

John – ‘There were definitely one or two moments before Blue came out when I wondered how on earth people were going to respond – and when the prospect of publication felt more than a little overwhelming. I guess that, in writing a memoir, you are giving something of yourself away – without having any control over the myriad ways in which people might read and react to it.But, almost without exception, the response has been amazing.’

Liz – ‘At what point did you realise ‘Blue’ was truly speaking to, and touching peoples hearts and minds?’

John – ‘My dad died a couple of years before ‘Blue’ was published. But he read a very early draft of something that, in parts at least, resembled ‘Blue’ – and he loved it. I always said it would have been worth writing it just for that. As I continued to write, I began to show extracts to friends and family and they were incredibly encouraging. But it wasn’t until I found Laura, my brilliant literary agent, that I began to appreciate the extent to which there might be an audience beyond those closest to me. My words and stories became a book published by the wonderful Weidenfeld & Nicolson – and complete strangers picked it up and started to read.’

Liz – ‘What has been the most interesting piece of feedback you’ve had from both police and public about ‘Blue’?’

John – ‘There are two recurring pieces of feedback that I’ve had about ‘Blue’. Police officers (both serving and retired) have written and spoken to me to say that my story might have been their story – and they wanted to thank me for telling it. That has meant more to me than I can say. Members of the public have written to say that the book has given them a glimpse into a world that was previously unknown to them – and that it has left them with a renewed sense of gratitude and appreciation for the men and women who stand on the thin blue line.’

Liz – ‘What was the most difficult and enjoyable part of the writing process?’   

John – ‘I started writing as part of my recovery from serious illness. It became increasingly cathartic – and I found that I really loved doing it. I have always loved reading stories. I discovered that I loved telling them too. Because much of the subject matter is quite raw, there were days when I had to step back from it to give myself a break. Once or twice, a few weeks went by before I got back to it. But it was always there waiting.

Liz – ‘Did you develop any writing habits?’

John – ‘To begin with I simply used a notebook and pen. I sat quietly and allowed myself to remember, before starting to write – for as long or short as the inspiration and energy were there. Eventually I graduated to computer and keyboard – and my favourite place to type is sitting at our kitchen table, under the natural light pouring in through the glass roof. Puffin – the 2 year old family spaniel – sits at my feet as I type.’

Liz – ‘Are you an avid reader? Which books beckon to you from bookshelves?’

John – ‘I love books. I always have done. I have to be careful what I read these days – one of the long term hangovers of my illness is an inability to deal with trauma and violence. But that still leaves plenty that’s wonderful.

Favourite books include:

• ‘First Light’ by Geoffrey Wellum: the breathtaking memoir of a Battle of Britain spitfire pilot.

• ‘Seabiscuit” by Laura Hillenbrand: the remarkable true story of three men and a racehorse.

• ‘The Shawshank Redemption’ by Stephen King: a short story about love and hope.

• ‘The Measure of a Man’ by Martin Luther King: powerful observations on the meaning of life.

But if I had to choose one book (or series of books), it would be ‘The Chronicles of Narnia’ by C.S.Lewis. I read them as a child and was captivated. I read them as an adult and was overwhelmed. I read them aloud to my wife when I first tried to win her heart. I’ve read them to each of our children in turn. And the magic remains. The deeper magic.’

Liz – ‘Has the book world been a surprise to you?’

John – ‘I bumbled into the world of books without a clue in the world!  I really had no idea what expect – it all just felt like an adventure to me.  And people have been wonderful.’

Liz – ‘Are you planning any more books?’

John – ‘I would love to write another book. I’ve got a handful of ideas, but I haven’t quite picked up my pen yet. There’s a family holiday to come first!’

John is appearing at the Chiddingstone Literary Festival

on Sunday 6th May at 2:45pm.

 http://www.chiddingstonecastle.org.uk/literary-festival-adult-day/ 

‘Blue’ was published in paperback by Weidenfeld & Nicolson on the 19th of April 2018.

Follow John on Twitter by clicking here.

Find out more about John Sutherland by visiting his blog here.